How to be happy
If life feels hard right now, this is the only thing you need to read. So, how to be happy?
Accept where you are at this very moment
Think about where you are in life right now.
If you don’t have very much money and you are struggling to make ends meet, there is no point in getting stressed or anxious about it. This will not help your situation. Where you are right now is just a moment in time and how you react to it will determine how quickly you can change your situation and ultimately improve your future financial or emotional position.
If you are worried about your kids, a family member, your parents, your job etc. If you are not with your kids, your family member, your mum and dad, your job, use the worry tree to set a date and time to have that particular worry, then let it pass for the moment.
Use a mindful breathing technique to get you through the times where you feel overwhelmed. Use the worry tree every day to get you through the worst parts. How to be happy in every moment is imperative to everyday happiness.
- If you are in debt, click here for guidance on how to deal with it.
- If you need to find work, join the LinkedIn platform and make connections with people who work for the companies you would be interested in working with.
- If you are a tradesman, join companies that can promote your services and get customers.
- If you make your own products, have a blog, or make youtube videos on how to do things (art and crafts, makeup, joinery etc) join local buy and sell facebook groups to get your products or services seen and find customers. You could also do this on Pinterest and Instagram.
If you are in a job that drains you if your co-workers are making your life miserable (being bullied), if you are not being paid enough or you have recently been made redundant (click here for guidance on how to appeal it if you need to) – you can look for another job or start a side hustle. Having been in this position myself, it is not the end of the world and you will find something better or start something completely new working from home. Focus on what you love and try to earn money out of it.
If you or a family member is unwell, giving in to the pressures around the illness really won’t help. Accept the situation without judgement and if there is something you can do about it, do it. If there isn’t, just stop, breathe and let any feelings of doom and despair leave your body. Use the worry tree. Do something positive (something you love), speak to someone who lifts your spirits, watch a funny film or spend time with family. If you have a faith, pray about it and speak to your faith organisation. Ask your GP if there is anything further you can do yourself or anything they can do. Look online to see if there are any support groups for people with the same illness. Always look to see whether you can give your body the healthy boost it may need by stocking up with a natural medicine cabinet.
Forgive those that have wronged you and let it go
How to be happy is to forgive those that have wronged you. Someone in your life may have hurt you deeply and you may feel that you could never forgive their actions. You can forgive, move on and feel better about the relationship if you want to. I learned a few years back that it is not how much someone hurts you, it is how you react to it. When you react to another persons actions with anger, bitterness and hatred in your heart, it will consume you. Don’t be led by those emotions as they can and will cause damage to you and other relationships you hold with other people in your life. If you allow these emotions to remain present in your daily life, you will start to distrust others who genuinely care about you for fear of being mistreated again but you must not let that happen.
If someone has hurt you, let it go and move on with your life. At times this can be quite complicated if you physically live with the person who is causing you pain or it is a neighbour, however, you should take steps to make sure that your future is not going to be around that person.
If it is a parent, sibling, partner or neighbour mistreating you, it is okay to let go and move on too. If you need to do this, you should not feel any guilt. You are doing what is best for you and the relationship. Remember, you can still love/like the person, but you don’t have to put up with it. If you feel you may need counselling with this, click here. If you have never tried CBT (Cognitive Behaviour Therapy) to help you with this situation, click here. If you have a difficult neighbour, click here.
Don’t live in fear of anything
Our fears hold us back from living. If you’ve been rejected, hurt or even threatened in the past or currently, you have nothing to fear but fear itself.
We always imagine the worst-case scenario before making decisions and this can ultimately lead to making bad decisions in order to avoid any fear! This could make you avoid family, work, relationships, friends and even going outside. Whatever the source of your fear is, don’t let it overpower you so that it becomes a lead weight or you feel imprisoned.
Life is for living, don’t live it in fear. Walk with purpose in every decision and action you make.
Once you let go of fear, you can do absolutely anything. Just ask yourself “what would I do if I wasn’t afraid“?
Stay away from negative people
Some people have negative personalities. To spot a negative person, their behaviours include worrying about situations that are easily resolved, they constantly see the negative in every situation, they suck energy from those around them and leave each person feeling despair, stress or anxiety. Ultimately they cause stress to themselves and everyone who comes into contact with them. Negative people are generally unhappy, oversensitive to criticism, take compliments the wrong way and they complain…a lot. Negative people feel the world is against them and can usually be found playing the victim in order to get attention and blame everyone else for their unhappiness.
A person like this will drain your energy. Whenever possible, give yourself a little space from them.
If this sounds like people around you right now, back off a little and give yourself a little space. If you find your general mood changes, it is a good sign that you were spending a little too much time with a negative person! If you really want to know how to be happy, this is a big key component!
Say what you want to say in any relationship
When you stop talking in a relationship, it can signal hard times ahead. You must engage with your partner and say what you want to say. Don’t let the little unsaid things build up into an explosive argument. If something they do or say drives you mad, say it calmly. Ask them what drives them nuts about you, you may be surprised. If the person truly loves you, they should listen, but that also means that you must listen too. Working together on the little things makes the bigger things easier to manage. Take some time every week or so to sit down and have a chat/heart to heart. Talk about the positives in your relationships, not just the negatives. Let them know you care and when you do have to bring up something negative, do it with kindness, not anger or frustration.
Imagine your success
I am such a strong believer in this. Someone once told me that if you aim low, that is where you will end up. If you imagine yourself as a failure, that is exactly what you will become.
If someone you love has given you negative comments, that does not mean they are right but that equally means that you don’t have to prove them wrong! YOU determine what kind of life you will have, YOU are in control of it, no one else.
If you imagine yourself happy, in a good job or doing something that you love, you will strive to get to that point in life. Never stay stagnant, always keep moving and continually striving to do better.
You can imagine your success and you can achieve it!
We hope you found our how to be happy guide helpful.
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